My previous post about the person seeking stories on the sex industry got me thinking.

Last Friday my friends' band performed at the Pussycat Lounge about a block south of the WTC site. The Pussycat has a gorgeous lounge on the second floor for bands and a strip club on the first floor. Before and after the band's performance, friends and family went to see the dancers. This group included women and all of these people I consider liberal, feminists (guys and gals) and open-minded sexually.

When I asked (at another time) if any of them would date a stripper, not a single one gave me an unequivocal "yes". Strippers (the more commonly used term) are considered a little "off-balance", even though these friends consider it a valid life choice. But mostly they consider it valid b/c these women could make lots of money. Still, they are dehumanized by same crowd. Many of the guys felt ever so slightly threatened by the idea that they could date a woman who made her living this way. I don't have a problem with women choosing this occupation as I think they are drawn to the money. I do have a problem with the fact that our culture provides very little access for women to make great money.

a couple years ago, I had a group of guys in my hotel bar in for the week for a convention. They told me they were going to Hooters (I still can't get over that there is one in NYC, but I guess it's for the visitors on a tear without their wives which is who these guys were). Whoo-hoo! They were very excited to see/have comely and endowed women in tight tops and shorts serve them food.

I balked at their choice and they replied that it was fine for those women to do it b/c they made such great money and the trade-off made it perfectly fine. I told them to imagine that these women were their daughters and wives. What was funny was after they returned to the bar, one of them sheepishly told me that they went in, but every single one of them felt deflated by my comment and went elsewhere for food. He said that it made him sick to think that one of his family would be doing that for a living, no matter how great of a living that woman would make.

It's all good if it's a stranger, but guys have some difficulty digesting the idea that a woman that they care for would allow other men to oggle her.